I'm sorry you've had such a tough time. I know you love your mom. Having said that, can you limit your exposure to her when she is in a manic state? She's toxic to you at that point and you need to protect your own mental health. You did the right thing by moving away. You don't have to be ugly to her...just let her know her behavior is unacceptable and you have to get off the phone. Please don't listen to all that poison. Best wishes.