Maybe this doesn't sound like a big deal, but I can't stop ruminating over it again and again.

About a week and a half ago, I somehow found my doctor's work cellphone number and I really liked her as a person and I wanted to see what she was like outside of her work so I decided to text it for fun. I know it was really stupid but I had the compulsion to do it and I did. I said something stupid and random like, "We aren't going to do this today." and she replied after a while and was like, "Who is this?" Immediately I felt terrible so I just said I had the wrong number and to excuse me for my mistake.

Now I can't stop thinking about what I did and I feel terrible for bothering her and confusing her. I also feel like a dirty, creepy person. I don't want to harm anyone in any way, I just had the compulsion and interest and thought it would be fun in the spur of the moment, but it was a huge mistake and the guilt is eating me alive.

How will I ever be able to look her in the eyes again next time I have to go see her for a physical? I'm really scared she'll find out it was me (I used a friend's phone though) and then I'll die of embarrassment from the stupid thing I did and she'll probably think I'm just as weird and creepy if not more than I do.

Does anyone have any advice of how I can try to get over this and forgive myself? I feel so bad and can't stop ruminating over the situation. Will she find out it was me? That's the last thing I want.

-hopefulforhappiness