I agree, leaving the past behind you sounds like a good idea....I know how hard that can be, but try to enjoy yourself and your family. I have family that were abusive to me--they would like me to have a relationship with them, but I don't. It is my choice as to whether or not I want to interact with them. I choose not to because I don't owe them anything. I don't think you owe this woman anything either. But, easier said than done...