I an absolutely empathize with your desire to refuse the meeting. However, if you do this, you will never know what was said and discussed there. You will only be informed of the outcome later. If you are okay with this, then thats okay. But if you attend, you can at least hear whats said. And at this ctitical time while decisions are being made, i would personally take the opportunities to be viewed as actively participating in my own care. For mself i would expect this to help me be viewed positively, and i would want to do anything to get out. Thats just me though. Good luck!!