Sophiesmom,

I feel so sad for you that your dealing with such emotions.

I have very few in life real friends, I can no longer work so I dont make the connections through work as I once did. Due to most of my friends working and having families I seldom see anyone.. It really pains me. The few people My husband and I see often I worry I will make a mistake and disclose my BP so "I " feel like I need to distance "myself" to a degree

I dunno life is so damn difficult to manage through

I think all the support you offer here is honest well thought out and caring.