I don't figure he is, at least about the house cleaning. As for help, I've called some places, including ones that help hoarders clean up, and they told me they don't take small jobs (I don't think this is a small job) and it would cost "in the thousands" of dollars. We don't have that kind of money. And, they absolutely cannot do it without the homeowner's permission. You can call them excuses all you want, but I did make an effort to find out what I could or couldn't do. However, even if they didn't need my boyfriend's permission, he would be livid with me, and I need them to do things the way I need them to be done. I'm afraid he would make my property and me "dirty," as he told me he would if I crossed him.