Yeah, I really don't count myself as especially religious, however there is something about ritual that helps contain and make order of things.
Can you choose from something secular that resonates? Plant a rosebush, purchase a beautiful piece of jewellery or an ornament or piece of art that could make visible the significance of that little being?
These things always do seem so tied up with other events and hurts. It can be like pulling the thread on a sweater.
I did wonder when I read your original post whether T would give you the kit back at the end, and what it would mean if he did or didn't?