You're not rambling at all, & you're no stick in the mud. Since I'm an alcoholic, I hesitate to say that others are, too, but it sounds like your wife drinks an awful lot. I'm sure you've approaced her with your feelings & suspicions, but it's hard for a real alcoholic to quit until they admit to themselves that there's a problem. Just my opinion (& I'm no specialist), but just keep reminding her how you feel. It sounds like an especially difficult situation for you. There's a group called Alanon for the partners & families affected by the drinkers in their lives. It's totally anonymous, so your wife wouldn't have to know you're going. As a "simple drunk" I don't feel as qualified to offer advice as a member of Alanon would. Google Alanon or AA in your area to find some meetings. Take care, & I'm sorry for your stress.