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Originally Posted by satsuma
Mona, I think it's lovely that you care about your T. BUT I think it's concerning at the same time that you feel it is your role to worry about her and protect her. Do you think that previous abusive T was trying to constantly force you into that role, and that it made therapy go so wrong and not be about you or a healing experience for you? To me, it seems like your tendency to take on the caring role and kind of "sacrificing" yourself for others can lead to unbalanced or unhealthy situations.
I hope that you don't mind me saying this and I am not trying to be offensive. And of course I could be wrong since I don't know you well or in real life.
I am wondering also whether you could see another T, in addition to WHT? Either see two Ts, or if not affordable see WHT every other week and then another T on the alternate weeks?
It might really help to get some kind of balance and not get into a tricky situation like last time? (I know that this T is nothing like previous abusive T, but just talking about a situation that's not the best for you...)
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Of course I don't mind you saying
actually it is really good feedback for me to hear that this is what I do. I do look after others and sacrifice myself in the process. I think you are right about ex t( well it's hard to know what to call her because I still see her) she does tell me things about her life so I do worry and end up wanting to take care of her. It happens in every relationship and I am really aware of it now. I really like WHT and am concerned for her, I don't want to just leave and not hi back to her, I hope that she could tell me and be honest about what is going on for her, even if she had of said she got an emergency phone call or something but saying "my head" this not give me much faith in her.
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Originally Posted by AttachmentesBueno
Mona
I am not a lawyer and know nothing about laws. But, I took a perfunctory scan of the rest of the document you linked and it is very careful to link the actions to the rolls one is providing or consuming at that moment. In this situation your roll is as a client, not your as your therapist colleague. I would encourage you to get legal clarification.
I'm sorry this is happening you once again, and I certainly understand/understood your reluctance to walk away and especially to report her.
Take care of what Mona needs and the rest will eventually fall in place as slow as the process is. Again, you are not responsible for saving others from your therapists missteps as a client, JMO. Best wishes to you.
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Yes you are right about the focus on various roles, I am my ts client but I am also a colleague, it's confusing! I think I will ask the IACP about what they advise in this situation and what my role is. Thank you for your reply
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Originally Posted by childofchaos831
If her problem is alcohol or drug related, it may take getting reported for her to get help.
I am an addict, myself. I have seen, so many times, addicts and alcoholics come in and want to stop, know they need to stop, but they can't. They keep having consequences, small or large, but nothing helps. Until the one thing they value most is threatened, they will not be able to fully understand the severity of the situation.
For me, that one thing is my life. Drinking and using makes me extremely depressed and suicidal. Almost every attempt I have made on my life, I was intoxicated. I had to understand that the drugs and alcohol were going to kill me, one way or another.
For her, if that is what is going on, her career being threatened may be what it takes for her to ask for help. I'm not saying actually report her, but reminding her of the ethical responsibilities you have could be enough for her to talk to you, and then to someone who could help her.
You are her client, not her T. I can tell you have a very caring, empathetic personality. You want to take care of her. But you are her client. That is not your job.
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Thank you for your response, you are right sometimes being found out can be liberating. I think in her case it could be very shameful for her. I think she is a fabulous t and I feel sad that she is letting her problems get in the way.
Sounds like you have a good understanding of alcoholism and the difficulties that it brings. Do you drink anymore?
I would like it if my t could get help, she is so good at helping others. She really has so much empathy I can see why she would start drinking