I am new here, but am desperate to get this out of my system. I have been married to a wonderful man for going on 6 years. He had a terrible child hood. His mom left when he was really young, and his father... oh the stories of his father make me want to strangle him today!!! Only now he's older (mid 70s) and appears weak and thinks he was a good father. He takes credit for how good my husband turned out, even though my husband experiences what I call night terrors (shaking and bad dreams) quite a bit and has very few good memories of his child hood. This story is very long, so I'll give you the jist of it, my husband just came home from a long deployment (he is military). He was home 2 days before he broke down and cried (something he's never done) and told me he didn't know if he loved me because he didn't know if he understood what love felt like. He said he is numb and can't feel anything. He said he doesn't remember even as close back as 1 year ago how he would tell me I'm everything to him and he couldn't live without me and how lucky and happy he was to have the family we have. (Last year he adopted my 3 sons from a previous marriage, he was also married before) I think he is depressed, because of my own history of depression. His face doesn't even look the same. He doesn't eat, hardly sleeps and now is really sick with flu like symptoms. His father came to visit (and is still here) for Christmas. Could this have triggered something in my husband? I know he loves me, and I'll not give up on him. How can I get him to understand it's not his inability to love? And these feelings he's having are not his "fault" he equates everthing with "who's at fault here?". Please help, I love this man dearly and I don't want him to hurt.