Good evening/afternoon everyone. How's everyone?

Been a busy roll call! I had to read over a dozen pages to catch up.

I went to the ward for a follow up meeting with one of the nurses there, for her to check in on how I was. She did it cause my therapist is on vacation and wanted to make sure I was okay. I revealed in the meeting I've been not taking my Zyprexa (I'm too honest about these things) and got a major lecture from the nurse and my wife at the same time...followed by my wife getting angry with me in the car because I made a promise originally that I would take my meds. I realized I messed up. I just hate how I could be ill enough to need these dreaded meds. I'm still in denial. I don't want it to be afraid. I know how many times I say it, but it's what is on my mind. I feel like the meds are the enemy, and perhaps even poisonous for my mind.

I guess I'll take them...and maybe then talk to my pdoc about trying to treat this with CBT when I see him in September.

Also went grocery shopping today. I hate going, but it needs to be done.