So, my long distance (online) boyfriend, who I have been dating for exactly a week, and I were very close friends, best friends. Jesus, the whole time we been friends people always asked us if we were dating, since we were so close and comfortable with each other, we told each other things we couldn't possibly tell anyone else. I truly do like him a lot!
Here's some background about me, I'm 21, i have been diagnosed with agoraphobia, panic/anxiety disorder, manic depression and BPD. So that being said when we found out we liked each other 2 weeks ago, he was already saying he thinks we would be perfect for each other and that he would want a relationship with me and that he thinks we would work so well together he was so excited and though I did agree I still asked for some time to think about it. He was understanding, he is truly the most caring, patient, sweetest person I ever met, who understands me and my mental health issues and I appreciate him for that. But I was effy about if because I was having and all these intrusive thoughts and anxiety, trying to figure out if it would be the right choice to go for it, if I was even ready for a relationship when I'm well.. me. So last Friday I told him yes, let's go for it.
Now I can't help but have these thoughts like I made the wrong choice in saying yes, wishing I thought more about it. I don't know why, I do like him! I really do. Why am I feeling like I just made a mistake. I know if I told him this he would be caring and try to work on figuring out why I felt like this but I'm not ready to hurt his feelings, I'm not sure if it's because this is new that I feel like this. It's (not) funny, because this is normally the feeling I got when I got a new cat, or bought something I wanted then realize I didn't need and I shouldn't have. It's like a guilt, the "was this the right move" (though I absolutely love my cats now) but like I don't know if this is a normal feeling, I never been in any type of relationship. What do I do?