I could get away if I so chose, he isn't keeping me captive, in fact many times he accuses me of wanting to leave n telling me to do it. He is my husband. I am completely aware of the fact I am being abused and am not staying out of necessity not fear this time. (Last time I stayed for both reasons.) I am staying simply because we do have love for one another, and when he is not stressed about something, he sincerely concentrates on improving his behaviors, as well as even uses things like essential oil to help him calm. Part of his problem right now is he is coming off a 6mo high from marijuana and doesn't want to ever go back on it, so it's driving him crazy. Then our neighbors - he told one he would no longer drive him around when he found out the neighbor was buying crack during those trips, and since then the neighbor been talking crap about my husband, even threatened him one day. My husband talks crap about the neighbor also, but doesn't threaten him. Then we have another neighbor who buddies up to us, then drops us for no reason and buddies up to the neighbor I just told you about. It wouldn't really matter who they choose to be friends with, but the fact they turned on us with no reason is worrisome. Then, we want to move... sometimes he says out of state, other times in state but different area. Sometimes he says somewhere with small population and doesn't matter if a lot to do, bc we have a car...other times he says medium population with a lot to do. Saving money is also an issue since once we married, we now receive no assistance paying our insurance premium, so we essentially lose over $200/mo bc we married, and one of our dogs passed about a month ago - pretty sure had to do with a neighbor..so it's a lot of stress on him n me causing tensions between us anyway n his coping skills are minimal, causing him to go back to his old habits easier. Normally I can deal better, but atm I am just overwhelmed.