My doc is pretty sure, she thinks i have disorganized thinking and i did have delusional thoughts in the past, but she just not sure if it's disorganized thinking or if it's just my cognitive problems, and i did a CT and it came out ok, so now she's alot more confident that it is disorganized thinking.

The thing is, It's really hard for me to remember things she asks me about when i'm at an appointment, even if those are things i focus on alot of the time, my recall is horrible, and i only remember things when there is a trigger to them, so maybe it just comes off as disorganized thinking and it's actually not (?)
which leads me to a thing i wanted to ask, are terrible recall, EXTREME short and long term memory loss, Slow thinking and tons of other problems i have with memory and thinking that i can't recall right now, are a part of the cognitive symptoms of schizophrenia, or it could possibly be something else? (maybe dissociative amnesia? i asked my doc about it but she won't listen) (or maybe it could be because of the APS i took? it didn't get any better when i was off risperdal though, but maybe it takes alot of time)
she thinks that it's all my disorganaized thinking and that zyprexa is the best AP for me right now.

And i do feel sort of disconnected from reality, it's hard to explain but i just feel like i experience the world differently from normal people, but it could be duo to alot of other factors (taking APs, having a terribly functioning brain, being alone alot and other stuff i can't remember right now)