<font color="purple">Another year, and another scheduled hearing (in April.) I wasn't able to pull documentation for my MD for her deposition last year, nor for my attorney ! before the hearing last year. Well, as many of you know, there was no hearing.

So here I am trying to research all of my ailments ...on the internet and document them from as many sources as prudent. And all that stuff... well... it's caused me to remember all that is wrong with me. Goodness knows if I dwelt on everything all the time I couldn't go on at all. Denial is a daily process. I have to focus on which dx is needing managing at the time (Pain, TMD, Meniere's, etc) and well.. focus.

This researching is causing so much memory to come forth and I have also begun having flashbacks. I thought I was handling it ok, but then this morning when I flashbacked to the actual accident, and what I recall from it... well, I shared it with my T.

Using my "marble" to help calm and remember, like T says, it isn't happening now, and even though I still have many symptoms from the accident... the injury isn't happening now. I've struggled just writing this... the trauma continues to rear it's head.