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Old Aug 17, 2017, 01:04 PM
here today here today is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jun 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 3,517
Quote:
Originally Posted by BudFox View Post
Couldn't hating the therapist have something to do with hating the therapist, or at least what they are subjecting you to?
Yes. And that IS what happened with my last therapist, to a large extent.

"My" issue going into the last therapy (and others), though, was that just my feeling of hatred was cut off or messed up or something. And also I almost NEVER felt a wish for revenge or to hurt someone else. (Hurting myself, especially beating myself up emotionally -- well, that's another story entirely.)

So when the hate was evoked in the therapy, it was intense and not "integrated". I could contain it pretty well, but not talk about it as a feeling. But, as I understand trauma theory and certainly as it seems to apply to my experience, I needed to have a situation in which it was evoked in order to experience and, eventually, to process it into something where I can just say "I hate my last therapist" and "I (sadly) hated my late mother sometimes in addition to (confusingly) loving her sometimes."

Maybe something like EMDR could have evoked it without transference, I don't know. I'm pretty done with therapy and I don't see any need to try that now, though.
Hugs from:
feileacan, koru_kiwi
Thanks for this!
feileacan