((((Mona)))))
I am so sorry to hear that this is going on with you. In NO way is this your , fault, as I suspect you know but may not be able to feel. I suspect this new loss is more painful because it seemed like she was the kind of T (kind, validating, compassionate) that you wanted. Thank you for being so kind and compassionate here on PC, you are very generous and kind and I hope that you find the perfect T if you plan on finding a new one. Take care and keep us posted if you want.