i agree...this seems more about her and her needs. when i told my ex-T that i was ready to start considering entering the 'termination' phase and i wanted to understand what it usually entailed, he first insisted that he did not believe i was ready to terminate and then briefly explained how some clients handle the termination phase...some tapering off and other ending quickly. his eyes filled with tears after talking about some clients who just end abruptly. at first i felt sympathy, but later, after the session, i felt angry. i felt like he was manipulating me with his tears to get me to stay and not end. plus the fact that he had no words of encouragement to say 'yeah koru_kiwi, i agree! you have done so much great work and have grown so much over the years, etc, etc, yeah, lets discuss termination if that is where you think you are ready to go" but that is not what i got from him...and it left me feeling quite disappointed and questioning how much of my therapy was actually for him and his needs instead of mine.

good on you for taking a stand for what you know you need..stability. that is exactly what i was needing from my ex-T and he just could not deliver it consistently enough to make the therapy feel safe enough with him.