Agree. That's OP's mother's opinion. Her opinion may be reality for her. But opinions aren't necessarily fact.

OP, is it possible that your mother is deflecting here and putting the blame on you so she can curtail any opinions that she has any fault in this?

I dunno.

Mother seems defensive, judgmental and doesn't seem to understand self harm. She kinda closed the topic for discussion, didn't she?

I used to self harm out of frustration. I didn't know how to ask for what I needed and there didn't appear to be any way to even ask for what I needed in my family.