I sort of oddly understand a little bit. I have different ways of being that even affects small things like how I like a darn cup of coffee. Parts of me can't even eat meat. I understand that it is scary not knowing where you will end up. If the new you or what to call it, is not interested in drugs I can understand it being frightening. You must wonder how badly you will suffer with the new stuff and if there are ways to ease the mental pain in that state. Unfortunately when I myself lost interest in self soothing of any kind, it has never really been a good thing. More like an aching void. But it hasn't stayed with me, there has been something after that as well.

I don't know why I even say this because I'm just me and I don't know what it is being you. But wishing you well.