Grey,

I do NOT think you a bad person at all! I think you're a person in a great deal of pain and who's dealt with much in life.

I think your issues are real. I want to say to you...my first experience with a t was HORRIBLE...also traumatic. I didn't know why I felt so traumatized. I realize now that it was due to PTSD and the therapist had no clues.

I encourage you to (when you feel like you can) investigate and seek out another t. one who specializes and can allow you to move at your own pace. I'll be forever grateful to my t now, and so glad that I took that leap. I was NEVER going to go to t again. Wow, now I can't imagine having never gone back. My quality of life has been saved.

peace to you.

kd