It sounds like you have a lot of stuff from childhood that probably really impacts how you feel about yourself and how you relate to other people. It's possible that maybe psychodynamic therapy would help you talk through all that and get some peace about your mother's actions, especially if she's still in your life. Therapy can also help you try out different ways of relating to someone and give you someone neutral you can talk to about forming relationships. Personally I have gained a lot more confidence through therapy as well, which helps when dealing with other people.