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Originally Posted by ListenMoreTalkLess
I think you may be expecting too much support via email, and it might have felt better to you to have a brief phone conversation with her. It seems to me you are making big assumptions about what your T understood and/or what she could have done and why.
I think support via email is difficult to manage for anyone-- knowing what the other person needs to hear based on their words, without any interaction to sense what's really going on. Much harder to "get it" via email than in person or even on the phone.
Are you often disappointed in your T or other people? I feel that I am, and what sometimes helps me is to realize that (first of all) people can be disappointing when you need support even when they really want to help. It's perfectly okay to feel disappointed. It's been useful for me to be okay with being disappointed. What also really helps me is to try to be more concrete and clear about what I need from the other person.
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Hi Listenmoretalkless,
Your words made me analyze myself a little bit closer. I have started really wondering if I DO expect too much from other people. I often do feel disappointed in my personal relationships. I've also made a lot of misassumptions that have turned out to be incorrect. I never realized I even did it until my t and I would have a problem, and we would talk about it, and then I would see where I misinterpreted something.
I consistently feel like I invest much more concern, help, and commitment toward other people than they invest in return, and it hurts my feelings. I usually don't say anything to them about it, and I continue showing care and concern, but after too many experiences of having relationships that feel one sided, it starts making me feel unimportant and unvalued inside. It makes me sad. And that is how I feel in the therapy relationship when I feel like my t just gives me the bare minimum...kind of like tossing a couple of dog biscuits my way. I feel like a scroungy dog that people wish would just go away and stop bugging them.