So had a meeting today.

Both parties agreed that it makes no sense for me to return to work, to all that stress, when we know I'm just going to buckle under the pressure again.

They kindly agreed to retrench me, and offered me the option of working the next few days so I can get a full salary next week.

The unknown future is quite scary, I wont lie, but I feel relieved. I believe this was the best decision with the best possible outcome.