Hi everyone,

I recently had an episode of anger against my mother and enough is enough. I want to get some sort of diagnosis so I can at least know where I can take this if it's as serious as I think it is. I just want to know what exactly this is.

I experience on some occasions (maybe 4 to 5 months on average) this sudden anger that comes about when someone triggers it based on what they say to me, or if it's a back and forth argument. It comes about as blind fury in less than a second, where I end up yelling at the top of my lungs towards that person. I almost get physically violent to get them to understand me. On a normal basis, I'm very introverted and avoid confrontation like the plague. I'm literally the opposite of this person I become. The only thing that felt similar to it was when the doctors misdiagnosed me with ADD and gave me Adderall as a kid and I would get furious at the most minor things.

To give a little more context on my life, my mother has always kept me sheltered and has been over protective of me. As others have admonished to me, she's a control freak. I can't seem to gain my independence without her getting in the way and controlling my life and choices. When I try to take control, she puts me in my place. She is very confrontational and always has to yell and argue with anyone even if she's wrong. She has trouble maintaining friendships because of this, including trying to control them. even my father seems to not love her anymore because of her argumentative ways and avoids her. Basically, she is obsessed with being right, rather than resolving the argument. Other than that, I mostly get angry playing video games when things get frustrating, but never towards any person or stranger, I'm always weak and apologetic, even if they were in the wrong. Most people would say I have very little confidence in myself and capabilities but I try harder every day to be more certain of myself. My girlfriend always inspires me to be strong and it helps.

As for the argument, it was about something that started as a conversation and had nothing targeted towards her, but she took it personally and started blaming me for something that wasn't even the point of the conversation. The fact that she doesn't even listen to my reasoning and continue to accuse me about being wrong and how she's right.

In case you're wondering I get violent with my environment such as throwing things around and punching walls, I never got physical with her but I'm afraid that it may lead to that one day. After writing all this down, I'm certain this is very serious but I can only know for certain on what to do based on your feedback. I'm sorry if I rambled a bit, I was hoping it gave enough to understand.