Just focus on loving your daughter for who she is. Let her know that who she is, is already wonderful. Don't pressure her to change because it only sends the message that you think she isn't good enough. That will do far more damage to her than anything you fear "society" will do. It sounds like she is already feeling upset by the way you're trying to change her because she is asking you to stop. Don't send the message that she isn't good enough because she isn't an extrovert. Just love and accept her for who she is. She will find her own path, and she won't have to be an extrovert to do it. If you build up her self-confidence, she will find her own voice without falsely pretending to be someone else.