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Originally Posted by here today
But then, when my own interpersonal stuff, in a primitive form, tried to emerge -- my therapists' UPR disappeared!!!!!!! Major setback, re-trauma, etc.
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Exactly my point. This to me is evidence that the UPR was a sham, an act. Then the therapist's real self emerged.
Quote:
Originally Posted by here today
Managing one's own stuff so it doesn't do that is what I would call a necessary skill in what I would call "managing the transference".
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I dont see that as a skill. That's more like repression of needs and emotions and judgements. I'm guessing that over time this causes psychological disturbances in therapists. It's not healthy.
My own therapist behaved one way for the entire process, then afterward on the phone she was very different. She went from fake self to real self. In hindsight the whole thing was a deception. She knew it, and I knew it. And by the way, to my earlier point, she tried to manipulate me into believing that my distress had nothing to do with failed therapy.