Maybe when you get through your emotional reactions to this, your logical mind can kick in & you will see more clearly what your approximate choice will be.

Oh yea, I had a few melt downs also. I understand that your son's high school years don't need to be filled with family drama. It's good to keep things as stable as possible through that period of time & new job situation will make the picture more clear as to your options....especially since you basically get along with your H except in one area of your marriage.

It is difficult to feel supportive of their situation when you haven't felt support from them. It is what it is. I don't believe in putting on false fronts because society tells us we SHOULD. I never followed SHOULDS in my life to keep peace or otherwise.

I always find that when stressful situations arise in life I usually DO NOTHING other than observe & sit with the situation for a week or so until clarity comes to me about what I need to do when it comes to stressful things happening in my life. Have found it to work best while gathering information & possible options. Didn't work so well doing it in my marriage because of pushing & triggers but it always took me a reasonable amount of time to formulate my solution to the situation. Patience is the most difficult thing is life.