Ok, I get what your saying about not feeling like he is your T during that session, sometimes mine will see that I am disconnected and he brings me back by talking about just things, food, what he likes to eat or make and asks me for some of my recipes, or we talk about work, but then he doesn't get back to the session, we spend all that time talking about just things, which I don't mind, but not the whole time, I know he is trying to help and feels that if we talk about normal stuff maybe it will lighten my mood for abit. But before I know it the session is over and I have the same issues that I wanted to talk abouit to hang onto for another week!!

No my husband is very good with the kids, and with the exception of one night that a arguement esculated with me hitting him first, then him hitting me back, we don't do much of in the lines of arguing, we just don't talk much, he is great for making me feel like I am two though in front of the kids family, friends. Always questioning what I am doing.....if I am doing it right.........he knows I hate that.......

Yesterday he saw our lawyer about the divorce, this is the same lawyer that is helping us with a land dispute right now, he has been our lawyer for years now. So he comes home and tells me that one of us has to leave, and it isn't going to be him. At first I believed him, called my T, because I was confused, thinking that I was going to have to leave, and leave the kids, because he said he wasn't going anywhere!! My T never got back to me, but his voice kept coming through loud and clear, that nobody leaves the house until a legal seperation has been filed. So i called our lawyer, at home.....my husband lied to me, to get me to leave, our lawyer told him he couldn't represent him in this divorce, conflict of interest, he did tell him however that he can represent both of us as a mediator only, if we can come to a respectable agreement on everthing kids, assets and so on, and if we went that route with him as a mediator and no lawyers for the two of us, then one of us would have to leave the house before we filed and saw a judge..........he never told my husband that I had to leave, or that he was going to be his lawyer on this........I was angry..........but at the same time pretty proud of myself for not lying down and taking it and leaving because I believed him!!!!!

so has anyone ever heard of a mediator for a divorce and not having a lawyer??? I wouldnt do it anyway, because I know it would be all about him and nothing about me........I hurt so much right now, I just want to curl up and make it all go away!!!!