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I'm so sorry things are so bad for you. The fact that you want to commit suicide means you need to be in hospital as soon as possible. You deserve support and treatment and you need to get away from the abuse. Please get help now!
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Pegasus
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein
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