i have heard of it.. it was suggested to me by a counsellor. But your lawyer was right, it absolutely HAS to be an amicable seperation for it to work. Yours is not amicable. From what you describe your H would pretend just to get you to leave first. From the little i do know i would tell you NO! don't do mediation. Your H sounds anything but amicable.

Right now, despite how we got to this point and all the pain that went with it, i think my H and i could do mediation. Neither of us has any desire to hurt the other or take anything from the other, we don't fight, in fact we get along better than we have in a long time. i still have a lot of fear regarding H.. and with very good reason. i lose it whenever he does something off track because of how bad things were.. but in the end, right now mediation would probably work and be cheaper.

that is the primary benefit, it's cheaper due to not having two lawyers. Fees are cheaper, less back and forth, etc.

It is not an option which allows for protection of individual interests if there is any sort of dispute. It is only useful if both parties can calmly and quickly work out terms.