Sooo, a huge chunk of my depressive cloud immediately dissipated as soon as it was decided that I am leaving my job.

Although admittedly, part of me still feels like a nihilist, I'm okay with that though. Its not hurting me.

Reason for this thread, I'm sitting in a bus and thinking of everything that's gone wrong, and I do mean everything, since age 4, and it suddenly dawned on me...

I was put on this earth to be miserable. It is my fate to deal with misery as best I can.

And that's ok, I think fighting it and searching for this ever elusive lasting happiness, is what caused more problems than just accepting my reality and appreciating the times when the sun does happen to shine on me.

Makes sense too, you ever come across someone who's worst problem is breaking a nail or some other superficial shyt like that?
You know the kind, sunnyass people who's never experienced trauma or any real adversity...

People like me balance the scales of the universe out, can't have too many sunshine Suzies about, the cosmos would be out of wack, not to mention it would be REALLY annoyinggggg!

So I'm a misery manager, that's my deal, and I think I will be better off now that I know which game I'm supposed to be playing with these cards I was dealt.

Silly me was playing black jack at a poker table all along

Anyhoo ��

Just wanted to share my light bulb moment that has momentarily brought me inner peace.