I too have a fear of doctors. I got very physically sick years ago and couldn't get to the doc about my problems.....I would go double the years between pelvic exams because they are horribly emotionally painful. My friends and family hounded me non stop to go to the doc and I was so sick I finally did. It's very hard for me to go, I struggle so much each time but I try to force myself because it's so important, especially for women. I'm so very sorry you suffer this. Please get some help.....see a few doctors to find one who you feel less uncomfortable with and maybe be upfront with them about your phobia. If they have good bedside manners, they should at least TRY to put your mind and body at more ease. (((Hugs)))