This week I learned more about self esteem and ways to boost it. I also spoke in group about my bed habit and how others got over it. Today I spoke about the biggest trauma I've had. This was when my "friend" screwed me over for my dream job by saying I sexually harassed her. I was hesitant to speak about that because I had to say what my dream job was and my job for past 13 years. In the group everyone offered me variations of what I could do, or saying sorry but maybe it wasn't meant to be. The therapist told me to think of it as one door closes but another may open, don't get caught in the cycle of trying to open the one that is closed. All in all I think it was a good session.

Next week I am going to continue this discussion and speak of resentment and forgiveness. I hate this girl. Whenever we work you can feel the tension. I don't wish her physical harm but I want her to know the pain she causes me. My former sense of "honor" , which was destroyed with this, wants me to lay it all out and have her think what a shitt& person she is. She has no shame of what she did and continues along like nothing has happened. I get left out of my coworkers after work outings or potlucks at work. And it makes me feel like sh it.

I know this resentment isn't healthy, but at the moment it's all I know. A friend told me this will eat me alive, but for the past five years, alongside this depression, anxiety and anger I don't know how I should be thinking in a healthier way.

Next week should be big.

Any thoughts on how to pass resentment?