i never called my t...i haven't cut... thank you, your listening helps a lot... i told myself that if i still had urges after i ran on the treadmill for 40 min i would use ice... i know that he doesn't like me to do that either ...the treadmill has calmed me...so i am doing better.

i don't know how to describe the memories... i guess they are flashbacks...one is just kind of a kid memory of pretending to be asleep at my grandma's ... i have always remembered that...but it seems really powerful since christmas... and the other is a picture not a real event that i remember...just like a snapshot... it's not such a good picture though.... and when they hit... they take on a life of their own... i have had them before but this one is more powerful...i am rambling again... thanks for listening

kiya.. thank you for the bandaid... ...i wish you didn't have to feel this pain... i wish i could take it from you

i started si when i was really little... about 9... but it wasn't anything like now... i went about 12 years without when my boys were teens... and a doctor who stitched my hand figured out what i did... back then they looked at it differently then they do now... and i started again 2 years ago... wish i could figure out how i stopped.

lyn