Get tested & prove your mother wrong. Nothing more satisfying than proving someone like your mom to be wrong. The questions are set up to het to the truth. If your moms answers don't match yours the tester will definitely realize something is up.

I'm sorry you are experiencing this. I struggled through a bad marriage for 33 years. It wasn't until after I left & then studied ASD behaviors did I realize that my Ex-H must be on the spectrum after one of my T's suggested that it might have been a possibility. Attwoods book on the characteristic behaviors of Aspergers is great. It might also reinforce the fact that you don't fall under those behaviors to give you more confidence to stand up against your mom.

I would be looking to get out of living with a mom like that ASAP. Can't imagine living in that kind of environment