I know what you mean about New Year's Eve....if it's triggering, and you are shaking and having bad feelings, why not stay home with your son? He sounds like he really cares!!! You can watch the ball drop on TV together, what a more intimate way to spend the holiday....you can tell the people having the party you are ill......after all you ARE, right? You can reflect on the year passed and the year to come there with your son, it sounds so nice wish I had a son!!