You certainly have a lot of insight into yourself! That's very admirable. I do think therapy would be highly beneficial for you, if you could learn to trust and not react if you feel hurt. You could talk through the feelings instead of turning away. A good therapist would work with you on this.

Also, it's easy to overthink things and over analyze. You could try video Skyping with you bf and talking on the phone more often. That may help you feel closer to him. My bf and I video Skype a lot and it helps to see his face and facial expressions to feel connected to him. Relationships take effort - especially long distance, and it's worth the effort of maintaining a connection when you truly love someone.