hi. I take a lot of supplements, including the rather high dose of vitamin C. To make my life easier, I spend just a tab bit more $$$ and go for time-release. Nothin' too fancy. I take 10 tablets of 1 gram, time release C in the AM and do it again in the PM. I also take a lot (6 grams) of time-release niacinamide. Niacin is preferred in traditional Orthomolecular, but niacinamide can get the job done, too.

The C @ 20 grams per day seems to have a genuinely, truly calming effect. Not sedation, not tranquilization, just...a sense of calm and resilience. The "alternative health" people say vitamin C at this dose can help w/ cholesterol levels and other cardiovascular issues. Combined with the high dose (1,000 IU) natural form E w/mixed tocopherols I take, there's supposed to be a significant reduction in the risk of developing TD. At this point, I have 0 EPS, 0 TD, no stiff gait.

I think 30mgs/Abilify was too, too much. I think the high dose may have contributed to what was labeled "depression." Its scary...physically, I tolerated that much Abilify, but now that I've been on 20 for a while, I concentrate better, I have more energy, more emotional range, etc.

bizi, if you think Orthomolecular might be something you'd be interested in, check out DoctorYourself.com: Andrew Saul's Natural Health Website .

Stability...recovery...what do these buzz words really 'mean,' you know? At this point, I find that my relationship with my parents is changing, in good ways. I'm writing more, and the quality of my writing seems to be improving.

But...as someone who was 'on the fringe' for 10+/- years, all that jazz...where to from here, honestly? I was spared going homeless by my parents, Praise God (!!!). Somehow, I avoided ending up in what's left of the state hospital. Probably a good thing. Now, most of its been shut down and the property sold off. Welcome to Mental Health "treatment" in 21st century America, am I right?

Ugh. I'm definitely not well-liked in the community. I --do-- take the psych drugs and I do benefit from them. Having said that...I think society creates a lot of sickness, more sickness that one might see in a less competitive, less materialistic, less...cut-throat world.

Sometimes, I think part of the reason people around here openly despise me is because I am no longer who and what this community created. I survived, by the grace of God, and now...well, now what?

thanks for reading, btw.