I understand now Golden, and I am so sorry you had those type of men in your past - maybe you are at a critical point in your life now where you are ready to address your relationships and seek a better type of man in your future. Lots of women say they become better choosers with age and experience.

A broken engagement is a big deal, how you feel about that is totally valid - and if these are real friends they will be feeling a lot of compassion for you right now. Have you been able to talk to any of them about it?

It's good that you acknowledge that you have a lot to be grateful for but it's okay to also acknowledge your sadness and disappointment, even if just here, as long as you balance that out with some positive 'good to yourself' time.