You are not being a rebel. Your mother is the adult and as such bears much of the blame for the dysfunctional communication patterns as you have described. Sometimes it is impossible to improve things if both parties don't work at it. My dysfunctional relationship with my dad couldn't be resolved because he was so hostile and refused to acknowledge the problem. The best I could do is limit exposure and move out as soon as possible. You may have to do the same.

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time with your mom. I hope things start to improve. You are not wrong to feel this way and are not a rebel. Sending big hugs.