I relate to some of the things you say about yourself, and on a regular basis I have the experience of not understanding why something bothers someone or not relating to their feelings. I have fairly low empathy levels, though not sociopathic and I don't have Aspergers or anything like that. I know I can feel empathy, but I feel it most of the time for people I don't know vs people standing in front of me who are telling me something sad or people I know who are going through something.

Like, one of my co-workers has been diagnosed with cancer and has been off work for 2 or 3 weeks now--I'm losing track--and she does all the customer service-type stuff that neither me nor my other co-worker want to do. And my predominant emotion/thought process is just irritation that I'm having to deal with these damn customers and just wanting her to come back and do this crap. Honestly, I think my other co-worker feels the same way (because I heard him mumble one day that he can't wait for our co-worker to come back while he was doing one of her unpleasant tasks), and I have long suspected he and I have some similar issues, which I think are common in people in our fields (i.e. we're both tech-y/tech geek types). I was probably disappointed and upset for a good hour this morning when/after I pulled into the parking lot and saw her car wasn't there because I was hoping to not have to deal with people. But I can be watching an E:60 story on ESPN about someone I don't know and will never know who has cancer, and they're telling this person's story and about some sports team that did XYZ for this cancer patient who is a big fan, and I will start crying. It's so weird, lol.

I guess, for me, in general I just feel like most people don't deserve my empathy. It's like what I just wrote on another thread in this section about having a "treat others the way you get treated" mindset, and like you've said about things that have happened to you and how it has affected you. The way others have treated me throughout life--and I was a very sensitive person when I was younger--just makes me feel like why should I care about other people when no one outside of my family has ever seemed to care about me (and only certain members of my family, not all). I don't care about animals, either, so I don't know what that other person's theory was when he/she responded to you--I don't think people should hurt them, but I also don't like them (except for thinking Canadian geese are intriguing) and animal lovers tend to irritate me. I love babies, even though I don't want any--I probably have the most feeling for babies.

On the point I mentioned about not understanding/relating to how other people feel a lot of the time...for years now, I have learned a ton about people through Google. I just think of questions I have about people, different social situations, feelings, psychological/emotional issues, etc, and just google them. I literally type in "why does [X] bother people?" and end up going to different articles, blog posts, and forums/message boards to read what people say about these questions. I can't say I can put myself in people's shoes after I do that, but at least I can start to get the logic of it or have that knowledge to help me know what to expect next time/know not to do/say something. Basically, it's understanding on an intellectual level, if not emotional.