i know it was not in my head today .she told me she was angry with me . she got angry because i asked her what again when she came in the room . she just standing there staring at me like she had something to say . so i said what!!! she went off on me asking me why i always do this to her . i freaked because she raised her voice and i was done for .i couldnt talk .i was in a complete panic i cant even remember all she said . i was sobbing again. she was behaving just like the mother . i kind of said that to her and she said she was angry with me . she kept raising her voice to me and telling me she is not the mean horrible mother and it isnt fair to her when i project that on her .but she was acting like the mother .saying the same things as the mother. my head gets all mixed up when she does this .i feel trapped like i cant say anything right but she demands me to answer her . i cant .today was horrible .im still shaking . she was mocking me again just like the mother does.saying oh poor granite is being treated bad by the mean horrible therapist .and all kind of things like that because i was sobbing so much .then she would raise her voice to me and say she is not that way and that she cant help me as long as i am seeing her as the mean mother .but she is yelling at me .im terrified about what is going on i couldnt talk she would not accept my words i was trapped .my head still keeps switching between her and the mother and it is the same .i know what i hear and see. im sitting there and hearing her voice and the mothers voice all the same thing . she dont seem to believe me .when she started mocking me again and raising her voice i freaked even more i couldnt stay there i was completely out of control.i ran for the door but she is closer and got up holding the door shut telling me i cant leave. she was so angry .she told me to go sit down because i was standing by the door and she wouldnt move . i sat back on the couch and grabbed the pillow to hide behind and she yelled at me to put the pillow down i wouldnt so she yelled again so i did and grabbed my small back pack and she yelled at me to put that down sit up strait on the couch and face her . just the kind of thing the mother would do and say as she is saying horrible things to her .i felt so exposed .so much more went on but i just cant say more right now