So I am new here. I just want some advice. I'll give a summary of my childhood. Warning there is graphic details.

I had a really bad childhood, I don't know whether it could of got much worse.
I was hurt physically a lot by my dad
my mum fed me pretty much only out of date food
my sister sexual assaulted me
I never got hugs/kind words/kisses/any form of love
I have always been severely underweight but my family teased me that I was fat
a group of strangers gang raped, water boarded, cut, bit, beat me and other stuff when I was 11 then they threatened to chop me up so I didn't tell anyone until recently
I always had to witness my mum and stepdad try and kill themselves
I always felt I was never wanted by anyone.

I wondered after all of this and more, is it possible to live a normal adult life? I feel like I never had a childhood and sometimes I go very "little" almost as if I'm trying to get it back what I never had, it makes me feel good, especially when I get the caring reaction I want (from my boyfriend) I just deep down feel this is wrong. Can anyone give me any advice?