ok if she's throwing things at you and saying she wants to kill you you need to get her the hell out of your house!!!

My daughter got in increasingly beligerant, had a horrible boyfriend who was a cocaine dealer and then escalated to actually violence. She would walk by me and shove me with her shoulder. She would throw tantrums, scream obscenities at me and tell me that she wished I was dead. I allowed this agressive behavior for years. And then she threw a her partially packed suitcase at me and knocked me down. It was partially packed because I wouldn't buy her a new bathing suit and told her to get a job.

That day something in me snapped. I grabbed her by her collar and tossed her out the door, threw her suitcase and boom box out in the front yard followed by her curling iron, jewelry box, and her purse. Everything purchased by me of course even though she was old Enough to support herself. It wasn't my finest hour and was somewhat of a redneck eviction, but I had reached my limit.

Don't take threats of violence lightly. I had a friend who allowed her mentally ill son to remain in their house even though he was aggressivenes, violent and used drugs and alcohol. Her husband was the sons stepfather and the son would say "Your not my father and you can't tell me what to do" whenever he tried to intervene.

This went on for years getting worse and worse. Finally the son attacked the mother. Her husband tried to stop it. THe son flew into a violent rage and KILLED him. somehow claiming innocent by reason of insanity he got away with it and still lives with her. She lives in constant fear for her life and does anything and everything the son demands. This is a worse case scenario, but an example of what can happen when you ignore threats.