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Old Sep 13, 2017, 02:37 PM
Anonymous57382
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The session itself was good. We discussed some relationship stuff and how it all related. We discussed my former therapist and anger I still hold towards him. It was all very productive.
Then at the end we had a minute or so silence and we both looked at the clock and I looked back at him. Then he looked at the clock again and said "time to stop".
Just to give some background, it is very important to me that I manage time boundaries and he knows this. He has never, in nearly three years of working together told me it's time to stop. I have explicitly said to him that I would experience that as rejection and I make sure I begin and end on time for that reason. It's a big deal to me. I said "you have never said that to me before" and he looked at the clock and said "Well, we are over". I looked at the clock, the second hand showed 20 seconds over the time. I was just quiet after that and he tried to make small talk. It felt a bit awkward.
I discussed it after with someone and I said I wanted to show up late, or pay him in 40 transactions of £1 each. I then wrote a poem about it with the idea of sending it to him to show him how I felt. In the end, my friend encouraged me to write an email expressing how I had felt and what I had felt compelled to do, and I did, including the poem, and ending "see you (on time) next week"
In less than 10 minutes he responded:

Hi RS,

Thanks for letting me know what was happening for you at the end of our session today. I am sorry that i upset you, I could see that I had and, yes, let's return to this next week.

I find your poem really endearing and it leaves me sad - as so often it cuts through the complexity straight to the emotion of the situation.

I am grateful that you decided against paying me a £1 forty times, but I did think it was a great idea!

I hope that telling me this has helped you set it to one side for the moment and that you have a good week,

see you next Wednesday, on time as ever,
T


Well, at that all my sadness just melted away. I replied:

I do love you, you know.
See you next week
RS
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Thanks for this!
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