If you are using your mental illness as an excuse when it doesn't apply, that could be a character flaw which needs addressing. If done right, apologizing is very hard indeed. Personally, what I care about when it comes to apologies is how sincere they are. The next thing I care about is the reason. If someone did something to me that was bad enough to warrant an apology and they said "sorry, I won't do it again" I would not be satisfied at all. People like to believe reasons are excuses but they are much different and anyone with a real mental illness should take this to heart and understand it. Just last night my husband ripped into me and had me in tears.......later he came to apologize, told me why he did it, how it had to do with him and the fear of the changes he is making and it made sense, was very valid and not only did I forgive him, I understood why and that helped me immensely. Some people are very unforgiving....it doesn't matter how you apologize, they are perfect and won't accept it. In those cases we apologize for ourselves. Reasons are important and if someone cares about you or is deserving of an apology, they deserve a reason too. If they care about you, they will care about your reason also. Sometimes our reason is "I have no idea why I did it and I'm sorry" and that is the best we can do. About the only apology I've ever been given that I did not accept was when I was told "yeah, I know I did some terrible stuff to you but god has forgiven me". Now THAT was a terrible apology.

I've always been a pretty closed off person and don't tell people of my issues. I can appear very standoffish, and I've often wondered if I should tell people "I had some stuff happen to me when I'm younger and people make me uncomfortable but I'm trying to get better". I feel that just putting that out there could help me. But some idiots would think I'm just making excuses.....the kind of people I care about and want to make friends with would understand and know better. I might do this going forward.....there are no blanket right or wrongs.....only what works for you and what doesn't. I hope you find what works for you.