My recommendation is that since you are having a hard time verbalizing this to your therapist, write it down and hand it to him/her and ask him/her to read it. Your therapist will understand and will be able to help you, but needs to know exactly what's going on. If you think that it could be dangerous to write it down prior to your appointment, go early and write it while you are waiting.

My heart aches for you. My first boyfriend, when I was 18 years old, was very verbally abusive. Everything I did was wrong. He would constantly badger me when I was driving anywhere. You're going too fast, you're going too slow, why didn't you turn on your blinker, why did you turn on your blinker. It was the same for everything I did. If we went out and I talked to his friends I was a s***, if I didn't I was a stuck up *****. My friends were all worthless ****** and I wasn't allowed to see them or spend time with them. Constant badgering, then the personal insults, which I won't repeat here because you know all about them. I was able to get away from him with the help of an older brother.

I still have some issues with driving with a male in the car, I always get anxious in cases like that and I have some other socialization issues that are probably somewhat tied to this time of my life, but it is much better than it was back then. You can recover, but first you must escape. You can do this.