I'll try to be less vague without being too specifc. Basically in session on Thursday she casually shared something small about her life that upset me to a degree that was not totally logical, even to me. It was akin to her changing a boundary with somebody, and it wasn't a bad or wrong thing, but it wasn't what I would have done in that situation. It was like when you see somebody has a different parenting style than you, and you disagree with the call they made but have to bite your tongue. Except it was therapy and I couldn't bite my tongue, so it led to an intense phone call on Friday about how I felt like I was wrong about who she is and couldn't trust her after all. She was super caring and definitely did not point out that her decision was none of my business, but it was still an unpleasant scene overall. There have also been some minor changes at her practice recently, so it tapped into my fears about her changing boundaries on me (or her changing in general).

I think the problem is that she has swooped into my life (okay, over the course of several years) and started meeting a bunch of my long-neglected needs within the therapeutic relationship, so I have a tendency to idealize her. Then when she does something I don't like or makes a call I don't agree with, it makes me question everything. Which is pretty unfortunate but something that I tend to do in certain other relationships too. I think your T and mine operate in similar ways, Elio, although I'm not sure if my T would describe what we're doing as limited reparenting. I definitely experience it that way, though.