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Old Sep 17, 2017, 10:25 AM
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Open Eyes Open Eyes is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,288
Artchic, I am sorry you are being challenged this way. Your father has developed a habit of taking his emotional challenges/stresses out on others and I know first hand how difficult that can be to live with.

He could be someone who struggles with ADHD where he is a "busy" person as I have a husband like that. The problem I have had with that is how incredibly impatient my husband can be as well as how he can come home and bring all his stress with him and literally fill the room/home with it as soon as he comes in that door. It's not surprising both your brother and your mother prefer to distance from him because of how he can fill the room/environment with his anger issues and impatience.

I myself have developed an exaggerated startle response from the YEARS I have dealt this this kind of behavior pattern that has come from others around me behaving this way. I have gotten to the point where I prefer to have him out of the home, away and busy and out of my environment.

It's not about your room or you per say either, he unknowingly does this chase and vent because he genuinely doesn't know how else to vent his built up stress/anger/negative energy. I often refer to this as living with Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde and when Mr. Hyde kicks in nothing I can do will stop it.
Hugs from:
seesaw
Thanks for this!
seesaw